It always amuses me when I watch entertainment news shows that use old footage of Britney Spears when reporting about her latest embarrassing snafu. Am I supposed to believe that Britney is still single and 100 pounds with long blonde hair?
Watching, what we now call “Old Britney," followed by footage of “Crazy Britney” attacking paparazzi, is actually kind of depressing.
It was only a few years ago that my part-Chinese, part-Filipinia college roommate had declared to me that she’d die to be Britney Spears.
“Every girl wants to be Britney Spears,” she said so matter-of-factly to me one night.
I scoffed at her because I didn’t want to agree with what seemed like such a delusional statement — even if it was true. We were college students writing research papers on Leonard Bernstein and analyzing British literature. Britney belonged on my 12-year-old cousin’s pink, glossy bedroom walls.
But secretly, in the back of my mind, my roommate’s declaration rang true for me as well. Britney Spears had it all — the look, music and the following. She was practically the new Madonna. How could you not want to be her?
You didn’t have to be a fan of her music to be taken with her. She was a young, blonde, attractive woman that seemed to be oblivious to the world around her. Her life consisted of getting her makeup done and dancing. It was interesting to watch her grow from teenybopper to full-fledged babe.
Who knew that six years later, the role model we all once knew would become a real person? Who knew that “Poor Britney” is the phrase you’d hear from most fans?
When an artist plummets to the bottom from such great heights of popularity before your eyes, you can’t help but feel sorry for the poor girl. And the image of her sloppily stepping out of her car, allowing the entire world to know she wears no underwear, begs the question: Will she ever recover?
The woman is in a custody battle with her ex-husband, had a nervous breakdown at a tattoo parlor and has been in and out of rehab twice. As a result, Adriana Lima graces my 12-year-old cousin’s pink, glimmery MySpace page. Recovery doesn’t seem likely.
What would a successful comeback consist of anyway? Would she undergo a complete reinvention and start her career over again? Or would she attempt to try and keep what’s left of her fan base?
Thursday night was the beginning of Britney’s long-awaited return everyone has been waiting for. She released “Gimme More,” rumored to be the first single off her first studio album in four years and is also rumored to be opening the MTV Video Music Awards.
But judging from her new material, the possibility of Britney recovering is slim. “Gimme More” is a sexy dance hit that’s sure to get played in clubs, but it’s not the monster hit we’ve come to appreciate from the likes of Beyonce and Rihanna.
She’s rumored to have turned down opportunities to work with hitmakers, Ne-Yo (responsible for Beyonce’s “Irreplaceable”) and Justin Timberlake and Timbaland. Many have criticized her for it.
Only her appearance at the VMAs will tell whether Spears will attain the popularity she once had. I know I’ll be tuning in September 9.
